Angry Teenagers – Channelizing it
When your teen is angry and screaming at you, it is very tempting to scream louder so you “win” the argument. But what does that do? In addition to prolonging the argument yelling back also means that you’re giving up your power. Giving in to the temptation can be quite costly in ways you probably didn’t realize. When you yell at your child, it simply escalates the argument and it turns him into an angry teenager.
What not to do
Curse or name-call:
There’s no excuse for abuse—not by your child and not by you. Being verbally abusive to your child only makes things worse, both in the short-term when the argument escalates, and in the long-term when your relationship with your child becomes strained.
Attempt to control that angry teenager:
This is one of the biggest stumbling blocks for parents. We hear from parents every day who, without realizing it, are trying to control their children. Holding your child accountable does not result in a child who is obedient all the time. Accountability means that you set the rules and you provide a consequence when your child decides to break the rules. You’re not a puppeteer; you’re a limit-setter. Let your child make his own choice. When a child experiences this unpleasant outcome, he can use that information to help him think about things next time he is considering breaking the rules.
A beating is not the way a teen will learn to do the right things. Often parents beat their children to the extent that they simply become immune to the punishment. In other cases, teens can be severely affected emotionally by it. Fear can set inside their mind.
What to Do
Walk away and calm down:
Ask yourself if the issue needs to be dealt with right now? Should you take some time to calm down before you address it with your child? Think about the situation carefully and allow things to cool down. You can address it later if you still feel the issue is important after you’ve thought it through. Teach your child the same technique.
Use a business-like tone:
When things are turbulent, address your child in the same tone with which a professionally-mannered boss would address an employee with poor performance. Stay calm and neutral, and stick to the facts.
Let your child know you’re having a hard time communicating with them when they fly into a rage. It’s perfectly okay to say things like, “When you scream at me, it doesn’t help any of us.” This is a simple way to let them know their behavior isn’t working.
- Channelize anger:Get your teen to work on different projects for school. Anger can be easily controlled with some constructive distractions like projects for school. Here at Projects for School, India, we have many science project kits which will help children educationally. Projects for School aims to provide children with educational and fun projects which will help channelize their energy in the right direction.
Visit www.projectsforschool.com and choose from among a wide range of science kits.
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