3 Things you should never say to your Child

Parenting is like trekking on a mountain – no matter how good you are, there is always the risk of falling. No guide book can ever make us a hands-on dad or mom, only instinct and experience can. No same set of rules can apply to two kids, even if they are siblings! Now I have said that, I do believe that we must stop from saying a few things to our little angels. Even if they look normal and harmless, they can actually turn out to be pretty harmful for our kids’ emotions and feelings..

Our children are indeed our reflection. They shape up more or less the way we mold them into, and mostly, it’s our own words which are playing with their conscience… impacts more than we can ever imagine.

1. Never Say ‘NO’

Rather than that, try – ‘Why not / How about’

We say ‘no’ to our little one million times a day, presuming that we are the best judge of what is bad or good for them. No doubt we are, but this ‘no’ has the potential to break our children. A seemingly simple & innocent ‘no’ can shatter their confidence, make them feel he’s incapable of undertaking a certain task, and can kill their urge to volunteer or help.

Worse, they absorbs ‘no’ as the way of life and so every time we ask them to do something, their response is going to be ‘no’! Thus, as a parent, we must make proper use of this powerful two letter word.

Hack: In place of saying ‘no’ flat out, it would be much better to give your kid alternatives to pick from.

When they asks for an ice-cream, ask them to try a healthier shake instead; If they ask for a new color-box even though they already have one, tell they when they can have a new one, instead of simply saying they cannot have a new one.

2. Never Say ‘You Must Become Like ‘Sharma Ji Ka Beta/Beti”

Rather than that, try – making ideals out of important values, and not from people

Personally I believe that we should try and focus on our child’s achievements, their good qualities. Instead of aspiring to people, we should urge them to aspire to values – confidence, compassion, morality, integrity etc. After all, it’s these qualities that make a good person, Agreed? Let’s be proud of what our child is as every child is unique, and work in the direction of improving the strengths.

I can’t deny, we are very much the society we live in and comparisons are impossible to avoid. Many times, our friends, family members etc. lament over useless comparisons and troll your child with a nonsense demand to become as good as somebody else. they may even ask us parents to be ‘more competitive’ or ‘stricter’! It is very detrimental not just to your child's mental and physical health but it may also backfire and turn them into rebels!

3. Never Say ‘Let me Do It For You’

Rather than that, try – teaching/showing them how to do it

When our precious little one is stuck somewhere in a task and is yearning hard to find the solution it is very obvious that we feel an overwhelming urge to offer the helping hand, ‘Let me do it for you’ often seems the easiest way out at that moment to pacify our struggling kid; but think, is it really going to help your children in the life? No. It will only make them more dependent on you to find answers to their problems.

How about channelizing or steer their thoughts in the right direction so that they reach the problem’s solution by themselves. This will make them independent and will also boost their self-confidence. This is our philosophy behind ProjectsforSchool.com too. We want our kids to experiment with the right material to be able to make working models on their own. This would help them develop confidence of achieving milestones, accomplishing things, learning science while doing something.

I hope you agree that we are our children’s role models. We can’t just cease to be the people they look up to and imitate! So it’s completely our choice of what we want these little buds to bloom into. That’s undoubtedly the best gift we can give them. Do you also have something you avoid saying to your kid?

Please share them in the comments, so that all of us can benefit from it.

Haya Abidi

Angry Teenagers (Dealing with your child’s anger issues)

Angry Teenagers – Channelizing it

through activities 

When your teen is angry and screaming at you, it is very tempting to scream louder so you “win” the argument. But what does that do? In addition to prolonging the argument yelling back also means that you’re giving up your power. Giving in to the temptation can be quite costly in ways you probably didn’t realize. When you yell at your child, it simply escalates the argument and it turns him into an angry teenager.

Angry Teenagers (Dealing with your child's anger issues)

Angry Teenagers (Dealing with your child’s anger issues)

What not to do

  • Curse or name-call:  

    There’s no excuse for abuse—not by your child and not by you. Being verbally abusive to your child only makes things worse, both in the short-term when the argument escalates, and in the long-term when your relationship with your child becomes strained.

  • Attempt to control that angry teenager:

    This is one of the biggest stumbling blocks for parents. We hear from parents every day who, without realizing it, are trying to control their children. Holding your child accountable does not result in a child who is obedient all the time. Accountability means that you set the rules and you provide a consequence when your child decides to break the rules. You’re not a puppeteer; you’re a limit-setter. Let your child make his own choice. When a child experiences this unpleasant outcome, he can use that information to help him think about things next time he is considering breaking the rules.

  • Get physical:  

    A beating is not the way a teen will learn to do the right things. Often parents beat their children to the extent that they simply become immune to the punishment. In other cases, teens can be severely affected emotionally by it. Fear can set inside their mind.

Angry Teenager

Angry Teenager

What to Do

  • Walk away and calm down:  

    Ask yourself if the issue needs to be dealt with right now? Should you take some time to calm down before you address it with your child? Think about the situation carefully and allow things to cool down. You can address it later if you still feel the issue is important after you’ve thought it through. Teach your child the same technique.

  • Use a business-like tone:  

    When things are turbulent, address your child in the same tone with which a professionally-mannered boss would address an employee with poor performance. Stay calm and neutral, and stick to the facts.

  • Be honest:  

    Let your child know you’re having a hard time communicating with them when they fly into a rage. It’s perfectly okay to say things like, “When you scream at me, it doesn’t help any of us.”  This is a simple way to let them know their behavior isn’t working.

  • Channelize anger:Get your teen to work on different projects for school. Anger can be easily controlled with some constructive distractions like projects for school. Here at Projects for School, India, we have many science project kits which will help children educationally. Projects for School aims to provide children with educational and fun projects which will help channelize their energy in the right direction.
Angry Teenager

Angry Teenager

Visit www.projectsforschool.com and choose from among a wide range of science kits.

We love to assist our visitors, students, parents in their quest to learn science, you are welcome to leave your questions / comments. Chat with us, use contact us from here or on our facebook page (www.facebook.com/projectsforschool/). In conclusion, drop us an email for any other queries and we would certainly reply with an answer to your queries!!

5 Annoying things every parent is guilty of

5 Annoying thing every parent is guilty of and  If you are a parent you are guilty of at least one of them.

Take a look.

 

I don’t hate babies I swear, but sometimes parents take it too far. It’s your baby I understand that you are completely in love with that li’l bundle of joy; but most of

the time you are over doing it. Trust me I know because mostly I am at the other end taking it all.

1. Talking about your kid all the time to me or to other friends, cousins, Kammwali bai and for that matter building ka watchman. “she can do all the

alphabets and … etc” yapping away even to the sabzi wala gets

too much.

Annoying things

Annoying things

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. #Facebook oversharing. Yes you do it. I understand baby love but sometimes posting every picture with all the moments and routines throughout the day is too much.

Annoying things

Annoying things

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. # There is selfie fever and then there is with kids selfie fever. Clicking pictures all the time with your kid while others waiting for you to talk.

Annoying things

Annoying things

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. # Showing all the dance moves and song your kid has learnt in the past 6 days even to strangers and every family member and friend. Even though your kid doesn’t want to participate in the parade. Forcing your kid to do it in front of friends and family is too much at times.

Annoying things

Annoying things

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. #let kids use Ipad, Phones Tablets at the highest of volumes in cinema halls and other public place, So that they don’t bother you. Its almost a sin to others ears.

Annoying things

Annoying things

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author has kept the identity anonymous, In case her cousins and friends read this she might be barred for life to any get together.
Published by http://www.projectsforschool.com/

National Education Policy 2016 – suggestions

A note from a Father pertaining to National Education Policy:

India stood 2nd last 73 countries in PISA conducted by OECD for 15 years old in Science, Math and English skills.

Almost 90% of the middle school students are taking tutions in addition to schooling.

About 80% of our engineering graduates are not employable.

http://www.viagragenericoes24.com/se-puede-tomar-viagra-y-alcohol

which needs reforms immediately. Then our aspirations are “Make in India”, “Startup India”, how do we prepare our students for these aspirations?

Our school education system is focusing too much on book knowledge. There is special emphasis on learning facts and theories etc. Most noteworthy, there is very less scope for students to do things basically linked to their routine. Somewhere we have lost that teaching-learning part in our education system. If we can let our students engage wholeheartedly, the learning would be much faster.

We need to explore means and methods to make our teaching hands on engaging for students. I came across a site called www.projectsforschool.com. They engage in curriculum based on do it yourself (DIY) models for science. If we can design models for various subjects the interest problem in studies is solved.

We need to enable our teachers to make use of these new methods as well.

Education sector especially relevant, needs big time reform at the school level. I hope you can do something and in conclusion start some change at least. Visit http://mhrd.gov.in/nep-new to learn more about the National Education Policy 2016. Send your suggestions via email.

Devendra

Magic words: Bringing back the lost art of reading

I remember the stories my dad used to tell me every night before bed. Akbar Birbal, Panchatantra etc. were an integral part of my childhood. They are the reason I started reading books. However, I wonder many kids today hear stories from their parents or grandparents? Why have we become so busy? So busy that we never fail to upload our kid’s dance photos but don’t find the time

to watch their performance?

Stories are such an important piece of our childhood. Do you remember how you watched the expressions of your grandfather, all curious and wide-eyed as he described amazing lands and far off kingdoms? In those worlds, anything was possible. The sky was the limit and magic was the norm. The boredom of reality could not touch you there in your world of imagination. Why would you want to deprive your children of that feeling; that astounding feeling of being all-powerful and invincible?

01-early-reading-habits-rich-illustrationsI agree our lives are busy. Our generation of parents have less time. But surely, we can at least give our young ones books to read. It suddenly seems as if reading has become an exotic activity instead of a common hobby. Very few people list reading as a pleasurable pastime anymore. Hundreds of Kindles are sold, but not many are actually used. How many of us still curl up with a paperback on a rainy afternoon? With the advent of the internet, the consumption of prose has surely increased but we barely ever look back to see what kind of content have we started consuming. Is the newest publicity stunt of the Kardashians all we can think of reading about?

My friends, if like me, you grew up with Nancy Drew, Famous Five and Secret Seven why don’t you provide the same companions to your children? Let Arthur Conan Doyle blow their minds too! Let Enid Blyton fill their brains with her incredible writing.

The biggest problem of the coming generation is how their parents and guardians regard books. We work hard and we want to party harder. But the time allotted to partying is small so we try to cram as much instant gratification into it as possible. Books don’t give instant gratification. They require us to think and explore and read between the lines, to fall in love with characters and make them come alive in our own world of imagination. But the pleasure they give lasts much longer than the mindless partying.

books 2There are many benefits to reading. It boosts concentration in kids and increases brain power. It makes your kids smarter along with building comprehension and vocabulary. Reading books also teaches the pleasures of slowly-building anticipation, the importance of lingering and reviewing, to draw new meanings and make and develop connections. It is with this vision in mind, that I’ve listed some ways to make your children interested in books.

  • Lead by example

So when you despair over your kids not reading, look at yourself first. Do you enjoy the magic of books? Or do you give excuses of not having time to read? Do you gush over books the way you used to do when you were young or do you wait lazily for a director to convert it into a feature film? Do not think your kids are dumb. They are smart creatures who will point fingers at you if you ask them to read books without doing so yourself.

  • Bedtime stories

Make bed time stories your exclusive time with your kids. Regale them not just with stories written by others but your own stories too. Tales of your childhood will be interesting and amazing for them. Brush up your story telling skills and weave magic through your words.Start Early:

The earlier your child starts reading, the easier it is for them to fall into the habit.  The sooner they develop a taste for reading the better it is, since reading if not developed as a habit at a young age can be one of the difficult hobbies. It’s like an acquired taste, the sooner, the better!

  • Books with pictures:

Start making your kid read with picture books or popup books. The colourful images will compel them to read further. Maybe in future, your child might turn out like me. I stopped liking pictures in my books as I grew older. I think it interferes with my imagination; not allowing me to think up in my head a particular thing described. Well, I know I’m weird but other kids love pictures so go right ahead with them.

  • Gift books:

Almost every year on my birthday, I’m gifted a book by friends and they are the presents I most look forward to. Gift your children books that you know they’ll enjoy. See how they become treasured and awaited gifts.

  • Build a bookshelf:

It will not just make your living room look stately and beautiful but the constant presence of books; seeing them every day will make your kids want to read them.books 4

  • Limit screen time:

This is extremely difficult. However, try to limit the amount of time your child spends in front of the TV, Xbox, laptop and the myriad gadgets available now.  In the longer run, it will also increase their attention span.

  • Don’t rush them:

Reading is not a race to finish the maximum number of pages in minimum time. Let them read however much they want to. Remember, this is not a chore to be done. It’s supposed to be a pleasurable activity; let it be pleasurable! Reading is fun. Don’t make it anything else. It’s a time for you to share the world of words with your child.

  • What if they don’t like it?

Well, in that case, don’t give them books directly. You could instead ask them to read small articles, creative pieces or some simple information about things, people, hobbies, sports, actors or hobbies they’re fond of. If your child doesn’t want to read Mahatma Gandhi’s autobiography, it’s fine! If he’s instead a musically gifted child, let him read about the famous singers of the world. Reading is meant to be joy! They will be able to find the true bliss only if they do not feel pressurized to do so.

  • Accept if your child hates it:

Not all people are made for books. Maybe your child has a different passion that drives them. It’s not necessary that your kid would love books even after you’ve tried all the tricks up your sleeve. Accept it. It’s possible that he may never love reading or start this hobby after he grows up. Let nature take its course in this case. Don’t push your kid too hard.

  • Write:

Try to write at least once in your life and encourage your child to try it too! If you both love books, you might find that you are capable of writing them too as I discovered after spending 18 years thinking that I was no story teller. (Thanks mom for bugging me till I tried!) You can write stories, comics, poems, a diary- anything. Writing is a form of self discovery. Get someone to read it and give feedback. Who knows? You may have some author blood in you.

Everyone wants to write. Everyone wants to have their words and stories read by others. It’s easy now with blogs and websites springing up left, right and center. But how many actually bother to read before they start writing? Follow the advice of the top authors. If you want to write good stuff, you first have to read good stuff. It will also help you to escape the ire of grammar Nazis like me. I’ve left books after reading 2 pages simply because I couldn’t stomach the pathetic grammar.

Books are such amazing things! They influence you more than any human being despite being inanimate objects. They can change opinions, rile you up, mellow you down, and make you laugh, cry or cower in fear. You could love their characters or love to hate them, identify with them or discard them as implausible. Books are truly like lovers. For the time we are reading them, it feels like an intense love affair with emotions running high, whether they are positive or negative. Books will remain your best friends forever. Because……………

There’s no friend as loyal as a book